Friday, January 11, 2013
This isn't the kind of life that i want.
i'm just too shy in front of strangers, i can't seem to blend in
i'm not really that out going.
apparently, lots of new friends i made was boys.
frankly, no girls would want a stranger, a newbie in their own little circle
that's the conclusion i made :/
but thanks to lii xiang, my primary school friend
she kinda take care of me alot
since there are a lot of friends from her secondary school who's in help
she introduced me to everyone of them
and even invited me to join them for lunch as i am obviously alone ALL THE TIME
well, how lucky would i be if i were in the same group as hers :(
but her friends are all in science.
and yeah, i'm here all alone in arts.
however, i don't regret studying a levels in help
i really don't
but it's kinda lonely being alone all the time.
one of the guys i met there, rui yong
told me that he thinks i'm very shy and anti-social.
i mean, come on, how can i be sociable around all these strangers out here
and to top it all off, they have their own group of friends since secondary school already.
lii xiang was actually surprised when she found out that i'm alone
cause she thinks i have a huge group of friends.
ya, i do.
but i kinda forgot how i made friends with all of them
and now,
it seems that i'm not good at making friends at all.
i'm shy and timid and afraid to talk
WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME?
that 'me' i used to know isn't like this.
this is worse than i expect it would be :/
academic wise,
i took further maths after thinking about it thoroughly
and i changed into another group
which made blending in a whole lot harder.
and that group that i'm in
are all math freaks.
they finished 6 simultaneous equation in 20 minutes
without using a calculator
meanwhile i'm still at question 4
(this is what happen to people who rely too much on calculator in secondary school)
and this goes on till the next set of question and the next set ==
i was so stressed up ==
that i decided to work hard on my maths and further maths during the weekends
and since my syllabus are all in english
i need time to get use to all of it since i'm used to bm -.-
is like i'm starting all over.
it's going to be a tough college life :/
my dad might want me to stop a levels if i get scholarship for foundation or something :/
well, that all depends on my spm results
(which is not going to be pretty)
i do tell myself that if i get used to being alone
i won't feel that lonely anymore :)
but i'm glad to have primary school friends who care about me alot
although we haven't contact or see each other for 5 years
thank you *hearts*
